"We Don't Say Those Words in Class!"

About two years ago my husband and I were shopping at the local grocery store.  I was ahead a few aisles picking up a few items when my husband comes up to me clearly upset with my son.  He goes on to tell me that my son, who was almost three-years-old at the time, pointed at a girl who had obviously lost her hair due to chemotherapy and exclaimed "what's wrong with her?  She has no hair!"  My husband, who has lost both his parents to cancer, was mortified and angry with his statement.  He told me he immediately told him to be quiet and didn't say anything further.  I told him that our son was just reacting to seeing someone who was different, that we needed to explain to him that the girl is sick and has lost her hair because of the medicine she is taking.  Children are understanding individuals and can comprehend more than we often think they can.  You don't need to go into details, but children need to recognize and appreciate the differences in one another.


My husband was reacting to my son's comment because he was trying to protect the girl's feelings. When my husband silenced my son, the messages communicated to him by my husbands response were to keep silent and ignore differences. However, it is important to recognize differences in one another, even when it pertains to a sensitive subject such as cancer.
 
An anti-bias educator must be aware of differences in a child's culture, race, ethnicity, learning ability, and medical concerns. I have a child in my classroom who is prone to seizures, to reduce her risk of seizures she must have a snack and juice every two hours. Instead of silencing the children and ignoring their questions about her extra snacks and juices I address their questions with honesty and let them know that in order for her to stay healthy she needs to have an extra snack and juice every few hours. I think it is important to be open and honest with children and teach them to appreciate and recognize the differences. Reading books allows children to see and understand the differences in one another. “The less experience children have had with a group of people, the more important it is to offer a variety of stories about that group to prevent children from forming stereotypes” (Derman-Sparks & Olsen Edwards, 2010, p.46).

Reference:



Derman-Sparks, L., & Olsen Edwards, J. (2010). Anti-bias education for young children and ourselves. Washington, DC: NAEYC.